Switch to Afrikaans

Reconnect with your partner in 5 simple steps

Do you feel like you and your partner are living separate lives in the same house? Here’s how you can get closer again

Do you feel like you and your partner are living separate lives in the same house? Even though distance can be a relationship red flag, it doesn’t mean that you should give up just yet.


These 5 steps will help you reconnect with your partner and will definitely bring you two closer again:


1. Put it in perspective

Distinguish between real problems and minor issues, and then change the way you address real problems. Try to be less intense. If you turn down the loud, fast-paced speech, chances are that instead of driving your partner away, you’ll make him feel like he has the opportunity to come up with a solution.


2. Go on a non-date

If you want to reconnect, tap into your shared interests. Don’t pile on the pressure by expecting a formal and intimate dinner. Instead, suggest a fun activity that you’ll both enjoy. You don’t even have to go out to go on a ‘date’ – look for romance in the everyday, even if it’s just taking the time to sit down and talk about your day.


3. Don’t play the blame game

We’re quick to criticise our partners when things go wrong but we’re not so good with praising them. Even when you’re in a tough situation, try looking for something good to say. For example, “I’m so glad you’re in this with me because I know you’re emotionally stronger than I am and you’ll support me throughout.”


4. Plan ahead – together!

One of the best ways to reconnect with your partner is to set goals together. Discuss your future plans regarding children, careers and even your personal goals. This way you’ll both be excited about the future and you’ll work together to make things happen.


5. Respect your differences

If your partner is a quiet or private guy, you won’t get anywhere if you demand interaction and conversation from him. So don’t take it personally if he gives you a monosyllabic answer when you ask about his day, or if he doesn’t want to discuss the dinner party you both just attended. Instead of saying: “You never tell me anything!” try encouraging him to elaborate by saying things like: “You must be really tired after such a long day?” or “I see Paul got himself a new set of golf clubs. Didn’t you use to play golf when you were in high school?”


Read more on how to bring the romance back and how to date your husband.

Like this?
to our Free Good Housekeeping Newsletter
How to age-proof your eyes

It's a misconception that our eyesight deteriorates simply because we get older. Here's how you can prevent some serious vision...